If there is one thing I know about the nature of addiction or obsessive compulsive behaviours is that they are all consuming and they take control. No matter what you have in your life, no matter what you achieve, no matter what you are interested in, no matter if you are talented, no matter if you are rich, no matter if you are poor, no matter if you are part of a family, no matter if you have no family, no matter if you own a luxurious property, no matter if you are homeless, no matter is you have children…… it all doesn’t matter because WHAT MATTERS MOST is the addictive behaviour or substance, this matters, this matters very much and is the single most important thing in that persons’ life. It is the most important thing above everything else.
It is clever and cunning and friendly and powerful. It will destroy your heart and soul but will take much much longer to destroy you physically. It comes in many disguises and the greatest disguise of all is inside a talented, gifted individual who has reached the dizzying heights of stardom, the frantic frenetic world of fame and fortune and it will still consume that individual in the dark recesses of their mind and it will be absolutely WHAT MATTERS MOST.
As it destroys self-esteem and self-worth the individual becomes trapped in a cycle of shame and guilt and the only remedy for that is to escape and the ultimate form of escape is addictive obsessive compulsive behaviour because it removes the individual from reality and creates another world.
George Michael wanted to escape and never truly learned to stay put and learn about himself. He never gave himself a chance to achieve freedom from his obsessions. I believe that the drink and drugs were the medication used to deal with difficult relationships, poor body image, low self-esteem and an empty soul. I feel sad saying that but that is my professional and personal opinion. He gave to others but was unable to give to himself. He gave the world his music and his creativity. He gave to charities …. but WHAT MATTERS MOST is what you give to yourself. If George Michael had treated himself the way he treated others and gave to himself what he gave to the world I believe he would still be here today.
WHAT MATTERS MOST GEORGE MICHAEL? IT’S YOU …….R.I.P